Thursday, February 22, 2007

Happiness

"Those who says money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping".

That's Bo Derek for you. Ok, you do not know who the hell Bo Derek is. Just take it from me that she is a once-upon a time the most exciting bomb shell that Hollywood ever produced. And forgotten.

But her words do have some rings of truth to it, up to and only if, your life terminates right after the shopping spree. That is because AFTER the shopping, reality takes over in the form of credit card bills (plastic money) and other unpaid bills going after your neck for payments. Retail therapy is therapeutic only for those who can afford, not us (OK, me) who are in the middle-income (OK, lower middle income) bracket.

Why, you ask. Disposable income, I say. For middle and lower than middle income earners, our disposable income are usually well disposed off, very fast long before the month end. Most of them, after CPF contri and tax, will go to daily expenses (including that triple-shot Frappucino at Starbuck) which are usually small, many and mostly unnecessary (read extravagant). We are usually trapped in the upper income affluence but without the upper-income financial capability.

Who to blame. Ourselves, of course.

But I am over with self-blame (and pity). I now want to point fingers at others. At Banks and Financial Institutions which dangle credit facilities and making it sound like its OKAY to spend now and pay later. At Hire Purchases scheme that blinds you to the weekly attrition of your finance via crazy interests. At scams that allows you to owe them even more via short-term low interest payment (pay up your credit card balances at very low interest for the next 6 months! Yeah, sure, like as if you can pay up all 10K in 6 months). At 7% GST. At high cost of transport. At 1 million TOTO prizes that I will never win but deluded into the possibility of (hope springs eternal). At how easy it is to blow away half your income via online shopping. At paypal. At e-Bay. At the Click Here Button (make sure you click once).

At the end of it all, I am back at myself. The main cause of my own suffering.

2007 will be the Year Of The Pig Wanting To Achieve Financial Freedom.

"Those who says money can't buy happiness simply didn't know how to save". Really ah?

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Death

Death. So final. A sudden fullstop in a string of words. An ending that cannot be avoided.

Attended a colleauge's funeral today. Not sure how he died, but it seems that he passed away while driving to KL. Cardiac arrest or so.

A few minutes ago got a call from Sis, saying that an auntie of mine passed away too. She was already in a state whereby you can see life slipping away, as the sickness that beseiged her eat away at her physical self. Stomach cancer. They managed to bring her back home before she passed away, leaving this world with husband and kids around her. With relatives and friends in attendance.

Two deaths. One sudden, and the other a slow wait. Different manner, same end.

How would I go? How do I want to go? We can never choose, can we?

As I walked away from the grave I am reminded that one day I will be the one lying there deep under the earth while other people walk away from my grave. And they will go back to their life, their routines and their loved ones. And forget about me. Just like how I will forget the person that is now lying there in the grave that I just walked away from.

I know, this has been a grim post. I do not know how to gloss over death with cheerfulness of life. Life that is with me now and will soon take the same path of the inevitable destination.

Innalillah wa inna ilaihi rajioon.